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Man Flu

First of all welcome back, I imagine it’s been a long time since you’ve visited and of course it would be, it’s been a long time since I wrote anything.

I’m not going to start this new wave of writing by making grandiose statements about writing every day/week/month as it pretty much always ends with me having egg on my face. I think perhaps it’s the weight of those self imposed expectations that make the blank page seem quite so frightening, although it could also be that I am very easily distracted.

Anyways on the subject of today’s post.

Over the last 4 days or so I have been suffering from Man Flu, it started on Wednesday and has been getting steadily worse over the last few days. Culminating in me taking a half day on Friday, those who know me will understand that the decision to take time of sick is not one I take lightly and will realise quite how ill I must be for such a thing to happen.

As I am writing this I am sure that there are Female readers all across the globe rolling their eyes and sarcastically saying or thinking the words “Man Flu”, they may even go so far as to scoff at the idea that it exists!

Well for the uneducated here is a quick Man Flu Facts Vs Fiction crib sheet, from

http://manflu.info/index.htm

Man Flu is simply a cold, the symptoms of which are greatly exaggerated by men.

FALSE – Man Flu is a serious and potentially life threatening illness, and will no doubt soon be on the Health and Safety Executive’s list of Reportable Diseases. Man Flu is a distinct disease in its own right, and should not be misdiagnosed as a mere common cold.

Women can catch Man Flu

FALSE – Man Flu does not attack humans with the XX chromosome, only those with the XY chromosome. This genetic mutation effectively immunises females against Man Flu. This may account for the reason that women widely believe that Man Flu is actually just the common cold, but with a bit of extra drama thrown in for good measure.

The best way to deal with Man Flu is to just ‘get on with it’

FALSE – Extensive research has proven that the only way to combat the crippling effects of Man Flu is complete withdrawal to the sofa and uninterrupted mollycoddling by the girlfriend / wife.

Men have a slower recovery rate from Man Flu than women do from the common cold

TRUE – The effects of Man Flu can linger for days and days, compared with just a few hours for the common cold. If the man is not permitted the correct period of convalescence following an attack of Man Flu he can be plunged back into a critical condition (see The Woman’s Role as Carer).

Man Flu is just a way for men to get sympathy / time off work / time in front of the telly

FALSE – Man Flu is a bona-fide and debilitating illness, would men make a meal of that sort of thing?

The pain and suffering of Man Flu is similar to that of child birth

TRUE – Though at least with child birth it’s all done and dusted in a few hours, but Man Flu can last for weeks…

The best cure for Man Flu is a cocktail of Night Nurse, Day Nurse, chicken noodle soup and whiskey.

FALSE – There is no cure for Man Flu. Once infected the afflicted can only hope that the gods roll the dice in favour of life rather than slow, lingering death.

While suffering from Man Flu, men would like nothing more than to go to work and try to forget about their affliction.

TRUE – However, men recognise the huge risk of spreading Man Flu to other men. Indeed, a single cough in the wrong direction could hold enough Man Flu germs to wipe out a small rainforest tribe.

For those of you like me suffering from this terrible affliction this winter, I’ve got some articles (from “reputable” sources) that you should point your respective female care givers to.

Links to the headlines

‘Man flu’ may be all a matter of evolution, Cambridge scientists sayThe Times, March 24 2010

Man flu real says expertsDaily Mirror, March 24 2010

Why man flu isn’t his fault (it’s because he’s so macho)Daily Mail, March 24 2010

Man flu is no myth as scientists prove men suffer more from diseaseThe Daily Telegraph, March 24 2010

Could evolution make men more prone to coughs and colds? BBC News, March 24 2010

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